What is Keeping You From Reaching Your Goals?

The Power of  Self Doubt

Do you keep trying to change something in your life, start or improve a business, or set something right that has dogged you for a long time?

Your greatest enemy is almost certainly NOT what you think.

I spent years trying to set up a new work/life model that I enjoyed, fit my skills well, and would allow me to live the life that I wanted to live.  Yet, even though I have started and sold or merged several entities into existence, there was still a hole that was not filled.

A Silent Stealer of Dreams

If you are anything like me, this description may sound all too familiar.  In fact, I actually think overcoming competition in business, or hurt in relationships, or digging out of financial ruin is easier than defeating our own self doubt.

Why is that?

I am sure there is a psychological, spiritual, or even medical reason for some, but for our few minutes together, I submit to you that it is because it is easy.

WHAT!?

Yep.  I said it.  Hanging on to our self doubt is easier than defeating it – even though we say we want to beat it.  By hanging on, we have built in to our process a safety net, just in case we fail.  More than that, we know it is there, so it makes giving up or not taking difficult actions easier.

In a lot of ways, self doubt become our warm blankey of passive, risk averse excuses.

That may sound harsh and I do not mean to be.  But for certain in my case, I allowed self doubt to hang around long enough that I began to believe it was my nature….my, “just how I am wired.”

It is not until I got brutally honest with myself, that I realized my own self doubt is what was keeping me from reaching my goal and building what I wanted.

Those. Days. Are. Over.

Path to Overcoming Self Doubt

First – take a deep, hard look at what is holding you back.  For example, if you keep saying, “I don’t have time,” use a journal and track the way you spend your day down to 15-minute increments.  Very quickly you will discover what you have time for.

Second – get clear on what time of day is your most productive time for getting things done.  For me, I am in the ‘crank the work out’ zone between 6:00 a.m. and 10:00 a.m. every day.  So, I set up an unmovable appointment ON MY CALENDAR one day per week to work exclusively on “my project.”  This ensures that there is opportunity for things to move forward.

Third – create a clear punch list of what needs to happen next for the first three or four steps.  I often fall into the trap of trying to figure it all out before I start.  That is a stall tactic that tricks me and delays me.

Four – question yourself for “what happens” if you succeed, AND if you fail.  For me, I had just come off a big win and discovered that my fear and self doubt was holding me back, because I was secretly afraid of failing the next time -rather than creating another big win.

HINT:  This is very common among entrepreneurs.

Finally – settled down and remember this:  Every one is experiencing the same self doubt.  Some just listen to it more frequently and more loudly.  From personal experience – tune that stuff out and just get going.  In very short order, you will see progress, have clarity, and be well on your way to the life you want to have.

And if you decide you need some help, reach out here for free.  I would love to be part of getting you on your way.

——————–

Kevin is a husband to Susie, dad to Natalee and Mallory, step-dad to Carlea and Abbie, a  life-long musician, avid photographer, political junkie, internet addict, and developing author. Request the free ebook, 99 Ways to Launch You.  Connect via Twitter  or Facebook or via Linkedin.  To request a free 20-Minute Breakout Call, click here.

 

 

Learning to Unchain Your Passion | Personal Freedom

This Post is Breaking Every Rule of Internet Marketing (and truthfully, I don’t really care.)

Until you get to the place of passion  where your work and your life energize you more than they drain you, everything feels like a task or a chore.  Finding that sweet spot where you can be “you” and create a living at the same time is a pretty magical place to be.

It is a rare thing – and the gurus out there will tell you there is a distinct formula that can get you where you want to be – I disagree to many of those “gurus.”

This entire blog series of me opening up about my journey goes against pretty much every rule of internet marketing and the life coach business.  I am supposed to tell you that I am sitting on a beach, money rolls in for free overnight, and that I am in full play mode.

That would be a complete lie – and is when others tell you that too.

Creating a life and a business that unleashes your passion is tough.  Really tough.  It takes brutal honesty, forgiveness, inner strength, and vision, plus many other things.

It was not until I went through the first several steps that I identified a skill and I resource that I possess that I had totally dismissed and taken for granted.

I help make sense of difficult and challenging situations.

That may sound odd, but my entire career has been serving clients in a way that helps them make sense of everything in their lives and in business.  I use different tools, conversations, evaluation, and any number of things.

But I always just “baked those things in”.  I was giving away what I am most gifted at.

Funny thing, I also realized that I enjoy the process; I get energized by it; and, people are very excited to get the help and see very real value by it.

Simple as that.

Every time I would look at starting an online business, or marketing a service, I would start with one question – how much money do I need to make in order to make this a success.

WRONG QUESTION.

Now, when someone calls or messages me about me taking them on as a coaching client, I ask one series of questions – can I help them, can I add value, can I impact their life at least ten times over?

If the answers are yes, then I take on the work.  If not, or I am not sure, I will offer help and then make an introduction to someone whom I think can better impact their life.

There are probably thousands of more polished coaches out there.  I am one that is all about passion.

Once I realized where my true superpower lived, all I had to do was move things out of the way and release it.

Are you drained by life or energized?  I would welcome a conversation about that.

——————–

Kevin is a husband to Susie, dad to Natalee and Mallory, step-dad to Carlea and Abbie, a  life-long musician, avid photographer, political junkie, internet addict, and developing author. Request the free ebook, 99 Ways to Launch You.  Connect via Twitter  or Facebook or via Linkedin.  To request a free 20-Minute Breakout Call, click here.

 

Choosing Your Influences | Path to Personal Freedom

Choosing Your Influences | Personal Freedom

What a great response to the Path to Personal Freedom series.  I started out sharing with a friend what I had worked through to come through a dark time personally and in my business.  As a result, I am finding that this is a topic that is helpful to you, and I love that.

That is why I do what I do.  I help you develop maximum impact in your life and business.

Why?  Because I had to.

Personal Freedom means that we are living our life on all cylinders – professionally and personally.

One VERY BIG WAY that I accomplished personal freedom was realizing that I needed to look at the influences that were in my life.

Funny thing – in going through the process, I discovered that there were some influences that I thought were good for me, when in actuality, they were negative and damaging to me.

There were several influences that I assumed were good for me – friends, relationships, people at church, co-workers – even family.  I had to step back and take a hard look at whether or not each person was a strong influence or a weak influence.

Notice the difference:  Strong versus Weak, instead of Good versus Bad.

A strong influence is someone who builds you up and encourages you, while also offering balance and clarity in the process.

A weak influence is someone who brings you down, discourages, but also those who may unreliably lead you to believe a certain way.  In my case, I was believing something that was “their” experience rather than my own.

Once I got clear on what was actually true in my life, I realized that my once “trusted advisor” was in fact holding me back for their own safety – not for MY improvement.

That person instantly went from one category to the other.

SO – does that mean that weak influences are removed from my life?  Not at all.

I simply choose who and how weak influences have access to my core beliefs.  I am friends with and even close to several weak influences.  However, I am very careful – much more so now as I understand Personal Freedom – who gets inside access to me and my core beliefs.

What about you?  Are you living with maximum impact?  Are you building and experiencing the life you want to?  If not, I would love to talk with you about it as a gift to you.

Personal Freedom comes when you choose the influences in your life.  Choose Wisely.

——————–

Kevin is a husband to Susie, dad to Natalee and Mallory, step-dad to Carlea and Abbie, a  life-long musician, avid photographer, political junkie, internet addict, and developing author. Request the free ebook, 99 Ways to Launch You.  Connect via Twitter  or Facebook or via Linkedin.  To request a free 20-Minute Breakout Call, click here.

Getting Down to Core Beliefs

Core Beliefs  are being challenged in every way possible.  But I can tell you, that is where your true success and personal freedom lay.  We have been overrun with relativism.  Now that is a $5 word for “what ever is okay for you is okay.”

Now I am not interested in telling you what to believe or what to think.  I have opinions, strong ones in fact, but that is not my purpose here.  I am here to help people make their dreams become reality – whether in life or business, or both.

But the honest truth is:

Your Core Beliefs Are Where Your Success and Personal Freedom Is Hidden

Now what do I mean by that?  We live in a society where it is becoming an expectation that we all become so neutral on everything that we do not offend any one.  That sounds nice on the surface, but the result is that by being so neutral, we also do not influence or improve anything.

That is not healthy for us personally, nor for the world around us.

We need people like you and me who are wise and respectful, and are able to share constructive opinions so that those around us grow and move forward.  Without that, we are quickly fading as a society into a world that looks more and more like The Giver.  I say “no way!”

I don’t believe in being bombastic or rude.  But I also do not agree with being so neutral that we are meaningless in the world around us.

Once I came to the place of getting crystal clear about my Core Beliefs, my non-negotiables; that is when success began to stir and I found my place in my life AND in my business.  Wow – talk about serious personal freedom!

My core beliefs include my:

  • Personal faith center
  • Commitment to personal integrity
  • Clarity on the type of projects I will be part of
  • Boundaries on how to work to live instead of live to work
  • Inner circle of friends and confidants whom I allow to influence me
  • View of who I am and what I am about
  • Clear desire to make an impact on mankind
  • Vision on the legacy I want to leave
  • Mandate that life has to be fun and full

Now there are deep discussions into each of those.  In fact, I spent a lot of time journaling my thoughts and opinions until I came to this set of core beliefs.  Every day I work to get closer and deeper with these.

Without it, I was existing.  Now with them, I am living, thriving, driving, and experiencing genuine joy and personal freedom.  I invite you on the journey.

——————–

Kevin is a husband to Susie, dad to Natalee and Mallory, step-dad to Carlea and Abbie, a  life-long musician, avid photographer, political junkie, internet addict, and developing author. Request the free ebook, 99 Ways to Launch You.  Connect via Twitter  or Facebook or via Linkedin.  To request a free 20-Minute Breakout Call, click here.

Making Peace With Your Past | Personal Freedom

Making Peace With Your Past | Personal Freedom

Every time I talk with one of my coaching members or do a presentation about making peace with your past and finding the road to personal freedom, I find it interesting that most people expect this to involve forgiveness and regret of things gone by.  Now that can be true, but more times than not, the process focuses more on perspective and application than you might think.

My past is filled with things I wish I had done as well as several things I wish I had not.  Sound familiar?

Truthfully, my “past” is also chocked full of details, knowledge, and vital experience that are key to me achieving my dreams and living the life I want to live.

The challenge comes in unlocking the keys you already have.

For me, this process has come from a life of wondering why I was so involved with music and able to perform and tour like I did, and then have a season of serving in a local church and being a spiritual teacher in a traditional setting.  Add to that, having the opportunity to lead a global team of marketers to do work in over 50 countries with one of the largest companies in history.

Believe me – at cocktail parties, my resume is by far the most unique according to most folks. (so is the story of how I met my wife, but more on that another time!!)

So why is my “professional career” so diverse?  Is it due to my inability to make up my mind?  Or is it something more deeply seeded and nefarious?

Not at all.

Like you, I have several facets and interests in my life.  I am not one that wants to be only about work.  (although I have made that mistake before).

Making peace with your past and achieving personal freedom comes from a process where you come to understand the path of where you have been, why, and then where you go from here.

In my case, my career path looks as though it has been all over the place.  Yet, from the inside today, I now understand that every “career” and every experience is being used today.  You could say that those past experiences give me the insight and expertise necessary to do what I do – coach.

I do not believe in life theory.  When I have a challenge or a question, I want an answer straight from someone who has been there and beat it.

Making peace with your past is more about understanding your journey, appreciating it, and learning how to let the scars become trophies.

Whether you are firing on all cylinders or trapped in the corner by your fear, your way forward is deeply rooted in your journey thus far.  If you would like to unlock those keys, I welcome the opportunity to help.

——————–

Kevin is a husband to Susie, dad to Natalee and Mallory, step-dad to Carlea and Abbie, a  life-long musician, avid photographer, political junkie, internet addict, and developing author. Request the free ebook, 99 Ways to Launch You.  Connect via Twitter  or Facebook or via Linkedin.  To request a free 20-Minute Breakout Call, click here.

Unpacking the Roadmap to Personal Freedom

Unpacking the Roadmap to Personal Freedom

I wrote a blog post the other day that hit a chord with a lot of people (I mean A LOT!)  And as a result, several questions and requests came in asking that I unpack this journey to personal freedom.  Without replaying the post, I shared 14 Things that I have done over the past several years to come to this incredible place of peace and creativity.  So, here goes the unpack you asked for…

I Got Honest with Myself.

That may sound like an insanely elementary thing to do, but I assure you almost all of us struggle with “Self Honesty” in one form or another.  In fact, I think it is so pivotal in achieving personal freedom that without it, you will not ever get to where you find true, open peace and happiness.  It will always feel like one thing is missing.

So are we habitually lying to ourselves?  Yes and No.

I have spent hours and hours with individuals who are moms, dads, business owners, artists, entrepreneurs, students, and “i’m not sure yets,” getting to know where they are and where they want to go.  Without exception, including in my personal life, we fall prey to seeing what we want to see and hearing what we want to hear – even about ourself.

In the early days of starting new businesses, I would only listen to my own entrepreneurial hype, simply because I wanted to convince everyone else what a great new “thing” this was.  And as a young, spiritual teacher, I often would ignore the mental accusations going on in my head, even while teaching.

Now, self doubt is a constant struggle for us all.  YES – ALL of US.  I have friends and clients that have seven and eight figure businesses who are still in slavery to their own self doubt.  That voice is currently tripping up their run for personal freedom.  The difference is – now, they realize it and are changing it.

For me, getting honest with myself meant that I came to grips with what I was terrible at.  However, more difficult for me was realizing and learning to own what I was actually really good at.

Until then, I had spent years chasing a career and life path in hopes that I would find personal freedom.  Sadly, I had been defining personal freedom incorrectly.

Here is how you get started:

Write out a behind the scenes viewpoint of you.  Journal an in-depth description of what you like, what you hate, what you chase, what you are afraid of, what you want so bad you would compromise things.

Now, let me warn you.  This is a tough thing to do.  It can hurt and be very dark at times.  It can also be very liberating.  By writing it out, you are moving outside the boundaries of just mental thought – it becomes real and tangible by being on paper.  Oh, and one other thing – no editing.  I simply set a timer at 50 minutes and just let free thought flow.  Yeah – those pages will not be made public anytime soon.  But the path to freedom started there.

Next, walk away from what you wrote and just let it rest for at least a day.   Then, go back through it as though you are reading a diary excerpt from someone else.  Read it as a third person.  What you are looking for are elements or principles to use later.

Finally, you want to begin creating personal “I Believe” statements.  These must be forward and positive in voice.  You are working to the place of being able to say, “I Believe that (insert your personal principle here.)”

So, with the help of a fantastic life coach, and armed with a renewed understanding and commitment to the principles I believed most, I have stepped out to a place of ridding myself of things that keep me mentally focused elsewhere. That has taken a long time to get to.

I realize that I have been doing the wrong things for how I was gifted, and that is why I have spent years being frustrated and tired.

Not Any Longer.

So I encourage you to come to the place of brutal straightforward honesty with yourself.  The process will be painful but the reward is priceless.

——————–

Kevin is a husband to Susie, dad to Natalee and Mallory, step-dad to Carlea and Abbie, a  life-long musician, avid photographer, political junkie, internet addict, and developing author. Request the free ebook, 99 Ways to Launch You.  Connect via Twitter  or Facebook or via Linkedin.

 

Life or Business Coach

Life or Business Coach

I was on a call the other night with a potential private client who was interested in me becoming their personal coach.  He asked an interesting question…

“So, are you a Life Coach or a Business Coach?” he asked.

I paused for a moment before answering to ponder how best to answer.  All along thinking which would best ‘close the deal.’  Then thought better of it.

“Both!” I said.

Traditional marketing and business channels tend to separate life and business as if somehow, magically, one does not completely infiltrate the other.

So we completed our conversation and I decided to pose this question to a couple of my current clients to see how they would respond.  (Besides, the best marketing viewpoints tend to come from people who are your customers already.  They know why they liked you enough to buy.)

Interestingly, when asked, both current clients said, “Both!”   I thought it curious when they went on to say that I am as involved in helping them progress their business as I am their role as a spouse and as a parent.  One even went as far as to call me his “Business Pastor.”

There is massive truth right there and I almost missed it.

Your success and/or failure as a parent, is a huge factor in how present you are in your work – whether in a corporation or in a new business.  As a result, you would be wise to have a strong Life Coach at your side.

Conversely, how your business is going will have a massive impact on your attitude, energy, and engagement with your children and your spouse.  Therefore, a keen Business Coach is a very wise investment that will return the value a hundred times over.

I should know – I have significant experience via success and failure at both life and business.

So why does the “professional world” try to paint a dividing line here? Because it is easy and less messy to the eye – but that practice is woefully unrealistic.

Life is messy.  Business is hard.  Family takes time and investment.

But the journey is beautiful, incredible, invigorating, and wildly satisfying if you work on the right things.

Sadly, I know far too many entreprenuers (starting with this one) who’s myopic perspective cost them their business and family.  Even though their family is why they started a business in the first place.  Odd, huh?

So here is my advice for the day:

Realize and embrace that as a whole person, whether in the “office” or on a little league field cheering on your rising superstar, the secret sauce to your success is to be fully alive and present at all times.

That is easy to say but requires exceptional effort to get it right.  And for that reason, a balanced, successful Life/Business Coach is often an excellent idea.  It changed my life and I am certain it will yours as well.

 

Are You Missing the Key Ingredient to Genuine Happiness?

Are You Missing the Key Ingredient to Happiness?

I have had the good fortune to be part of several amazing conferences, mastermind groups, and direct discussions with many of today’s top success coaches and life/business coaches.  People like Jack Canfield, Brendon Burchard, Marie Forleo, and many, many others.

What is interesting to me is that there is a common denominator in everything they teach.   Even with a multitude of variations and products and approaches to the audiences they serve, ALL will say that there is one thing – above all else – that will determine those who do well and those who will struggle, if they get started at all.

What is it?  MINDSET.

Now, I am a realist.  I am not someone who believes that you can just “name it and claim it,” or “believe to receive.”  I know that the core of true success is hard work.  However, my direct, personal experience is without the proper mindset, you are doomed before you ever begin.

I believe it was Henry Ford that used to say, “Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t – you’re right!”

That sounds simple, but it is absolutely true.  Take it from someone who has a pretty wide streak of cynicism, skepticism, and doubt.  I have learned that before taking a step in any direction, I must first understand, know, and be able to walk in the mindset that I seek.

True Happiness begins with a choice.

Now I know (all too well from my personal journey) that depression and self doubt are very real.  I am far from the person who always and only sees the upside and the glass full.  I know that all of us have days or seasons where we simply do not feel like we have it in us.  Moreover, I dare not challenge those struggle with something far more clinical in nature, however I will say this:

Whether you are constantly up, constantly down, or somewhere hanging on for dear life to the roller coaster in between, the path to your journey begins with a clear determination of where you are going to end up – along with a commitment that you will not stop until you get there.

Success, happiness, contentment, vision, and peace, all begin with one thing – Mindset.

How is yours today?

——————————————

Kevin is a husband to Susie, dad to Natalee and Mallory, step-dad to Carlea and Abbie, a  life-long musician, avid photographer, political junkie, internet addict, and developing author. Request the free ebook, 99 Ways to Launch You.  Connect via Twitter  or Facebook or via Linkedin.

A Life Path Unexpected

A Life Path Unexpected

If you had asked me 20 years ago where I would be today, there is zero chance I would have been right.

In 1995, I was in my fourth year of being a pastor at a local church in Owasso, Oklahoma.  My first daughter, Natalee, had just been born.  And I was on what I thought was the fast track as a quickly ascending young, spiritual teacher.

My how things have changed.  Some on purpose and others in spite of my very best efforts to keep them from happening – but I would not trade the journey for anything.

You see, today I am a husband to Susie, dad to Natalee and Mallory, step-dad to Carlea and Abbie, an aspiring author, emerging life and business coach, and a 25-year veteran of the marketing and advertising world – and at heart, a storyteller, a musician, and dreamer.

There are all sorts of things that I hope to still move forward, however I can honestly say I have never been more at home in my own skin, and more joyful in my daily life path than today.

I am at peace.

Not without hurt; not without challenges; not with sorrows.  But today, more than ever before, alive.

It is my most sincere hope that you are as well.  That you are loved beyond your wildest dreams and that your life is surrounded with laughter, passion, hope, and joy.

So how did that happen?  Simple.  I…

  • Got honest with myself.
  • Made peace with my past.
  • Moved as close as possible to my true core beliefs.
  • Released influences that needed to be.
  • Learned how to unchain my passion.
  • Tuned out my own doubt.
  • Centered my focus on being true.
  • Discovered the ratio of work:live.
  • Walked away from legalism.
  • Rediscovered laughter.
  • Expressed constant gratitude.
  • Realized fear is healthy if understood.
  • Exercised genuine service.
  • Re-engaged the art of being quiet. Often.

It is through this journey that I am awakened.  I am postured –  forward. upward. outward.

I invite you to come join this life path.  The view is spectacular.

Everyday Life Experience – Discovering Wisdom

Anyone that knows me professionally knows that I have 25 years life experience in marketing, branding, and advertising, in one form or another.  Whether 53 countries as a Wal-Mart executive, or starting a new venture like Compass Business Plans, serving in a church, or taking on clients in Fine Art or High Performance Sales Coaching.

In all of these roles, the common denominators include classic storytelling for the brand and creating a voice that allows consumers like us to learn to believe, trust, then buy.

Sounds simple right?  Well, it is and its not.

But the funny thing is when turning my 25 years of branding and life experience around to shine on my own “brand,” I have to admit I have fallen short.  Not so much on the look and feel of things – but honestly, more on the substance and the content.

I found myself knowing what I want to do – but not quite sure what to say once I got there.

Should I be an author?  Develop a product?  Create a workshop?  Any of them could work – but more importantly, once I built it, would I enjoy it?

But over the last four to five years, I have been on a personal journey toward a better and higher understanding of what genuine success looks like.   I spent years chasing the title, the company, the salary, the suits, the latest (fill in the blank here) thinking that success was “over there” somewhere if I just ran fast enough.

That is a lie straight out of the pit.

So what about this thing called life experience and high-level business experience?  What do I do with all of this branding, marketing, and advertising experience?  The answer is simple –

Help. People.

Finally.  There it is.  For years I have fallen into the trap that is far to frequent for entrepreneurs.  I tried to create a product to sell instead solving challenges.  I would get fixated on the multiplication before remembering that the “brand” happens in moments – with people.

(There is a huge lesson for my former employer and world’s largest retailer – get back to the moments with customers)

So, in getting back to the core of what I know to be meaningful and helpful to people like you, here is what I want to do.  Whether you are a first-time entrepreneur, someone who just wants to get life back on track, or a business owner trying to scale while juggling success and family, I want to talk to you.

I am opening up my schedule to the first 15 people who read this blog post who would like to have a 20-minute conversation about your life, your work or business, your family, and how to pursue excellence and happiness.

Completely free.  No sales pitch.

The goal of our conversation is give you clarity and a path to begin on to get everything on the right track.  Interested?

If so, comment below and then USE THIS LINK to schedule our 20-minute conversation.

I look forward to hearing about what you are up to.

Talk soon –

Kevin